Happy day to you!
It seems with every client I work with, the struggle with fear and the anxiety it produces comes up. We all slip into this at times; but what strategies do you use when this happens to you? As Dr. Phil asks, "How are they workin' for ya'?"
Do you retreat and find ways to escape the feelings? Maybe you use food, or substances that shift your mood and focus, or maybe you get busy in some way.
These strategies might help to temporarily distract you from the thoughts that created the fear; but they don't really work in a lasting way, do they?
It seems with every client I work with, the struggle with fear and the anxiety it produces comes up. We all slip into this at times; but what strategies do you use when this happens to you? As Dr. Phil asks, "How are they workin' for ya'?"
Do you retreat and find ways to escape the feelings? Maybe you use food, or substances that shift your mood and focus, or maybe you get busy in some way.
These strategies might help to temporarily distract you from the thoughts that created the fear; but they don't really work in a lasting way, do they?
Oh, oh. What IS that? You know what creates fear? It's created when you focus on what's wrong or what might go wrong.
I believe that at some time during our evolution this was a very important strategy for our survival.
To stay safe, we literally had to look out for what might be lurking in the woods.
I believe that at some time during our evolution this was a very important strategy for our survival.
To stay safe, we literally had to look out for what might be lurking in the woods.
And, there are still times when it might be appropriate to notice, be prudent, and take appropriate actions for our survival. But, more often than not, our life is not really at stake, and our thinking is irrational and counterproductive.
New Possibilities for YOU!
New Possibilities for YOU!
If you'd like a better way, here's what I suggest you remember. The positive intention underlying fear is to know that you'll be okay. That's what it's all about.
When you feel fear, it's your emotional guidance system reminding you that you're telling a story that's putting you in that survival mode; and it's not necessarily true! You need to question your thinking. "Is this interpretation I'm making of my situation really true, or are there other possible ways of thinking about this? What might feel better? (How might someone else think about this?)" You'll find there's pretty much always some light behind your clouded thinking.
When you feel fear, it's your emotional guidance system reminding you that you're telling a story that's putting you in that survival mode; and it's not necessarily true! You need to question your thinking. "Is this interpretation I'm making of my situation really true, or are there other possible ways of thinking about this? What might feel better? (How might someone else think about this?)" You'll find there's pretty much always some light behind your clouded thinking.
Before your mind can be resourceful enough to think differently and come up with a better feeling story that will reassure you that you'll be okay, you need to relax to shift your brain out of that inappropriate, old, habitual survival mode. A few deep breaths is usually all you need; or you might find a way to really relax.
As you take those deep breaths, you might add a soothing thought like, "Relax. I'm safe. My actual life is not in danger; and these thoughts I'm having aren't necessarily true." Then continue with what I just mentioned earlier. You'll feel SO much better, AND rather than escaping and avoiding, you'll be able to really take care of your concerns and those associated feelings much more effectively.
As always, there's no need to struggle with this on your own. If this seems too hard and you'd like some help, contact me and we'll schedule a time to explore new possibilities for you.
As you take those deep breaths, you might add a soothing thought like, "Relax. I'm safe. My actual life is not in danger; and these thoughts I'm having aren't necessarily true." Then continue with what I just mentioned earlier. You'll feel SO much better, AND rather than escaping and avoiding, you'll be able to really take care of your concerns and those associated feelings much more effectively.
As always, there's no need to struggle with this on your own. If this seems too hard and you'd like some help, contact me and we'll schedule a time to explore new possibilities for you.
"For anyone who is seeking a little more personalized conversation, I highly recommend calling Ann for her complimentary Happiness Upgrade Activation call. I have been coaching with her; and in the areas of my life where I had felt "stuck" in a seemingly endless cycle she has helped me to achieve monumental growth and ultimately unbridled joy." Sera V.
Do you use food to deal with your feelings or as a way to feel good? Do you struggle with weight and find that it takes more will power than you have or requires more deprivation than you like?
Then I can't encourage you enough to join me in my Fall Inner Way Weight Loss Program, starting in September!
In this Inner Way Weight Loss Group, you will:
Watch for my e-mails with the details soon. Groups are limited in size for lots of personal attention; so if you want to assure your spot, feel free to contact me now. I can't wait to get started again!
"I feel like, for the first time, I am not using willpower and guilt to lose weight; and I am losing weight without feeling deprived...a first for me! Another benefit of this program is that I have begun to change my thinking from "I can't do this" to "anything is possible." And, this new belief applies to more than weight loss.
Basically, I really love everything about this program...the concepts, the exercises that help us practice the tools and the group support. Thank you, Ann!" Gina J.
Supporting you in greater ease and joy, with a warm heart,
Ann
Then I can't encourage you enough to join me in my Fall Inner Way Weight Loss Program, starting in September!
In this Inner Way Weight Loss Group, you will:
- resolve any internal “tug-of-war” conflicts that make your weight loss an unnecessary struggle
- learn and use effective mental strategies to make your weight loss easier
- create lasting, intrinsic motivation strategies that work
- learn forgiveness and unconditional love and acceptance of yourself
- learn how to effectively overcome your triggers and challenges with food that seem to sabotage you
- change your beliefs that are contributing to being overweight to ones that support you in being naturally and easily healthy, happy, and slender
- learn and adopt eating strategies of naturally slender people so you can become one, too
- learn more effective strategies for preventing and dealing with the stress and emotions that can lead to unhealthy habits
Watch for my e-mails with the details soon. Groups are limited in size for lots of personal attention; so if you want to assure your spot, feel free to contact me now. I can't wait to get started again!
"I feel like, for the first time, I am not using willpower and guilt to lose weight; and I am losing weight without feeling deprived...a first for me! Another benefit of this program is that I have begun to change my thinking from "I can't do this" to "anything is possible." And, this new belief applies to more than weight loss.
Basically, I really love everything about this program...the concepts, the exercises that help us practice the tools and the group support. Thank you, Ann!" Gina J.
Supporting you in greater ease and joy, with a warm heart,
Ann
IF YOU USE G MAIL, PLEASE READ THIS:
I’m not sure if you’ve heard about the changes coming to Gmail … they have a new feature that automatically filters your email into "Primary", "Social" and "Promotions".
The problem with this is that Gmail may very likely classify ALL of my emails, including my newsletters to you, as Promotions and you may never receive messages from me in your primary inbox again unless you take the simple steps below. It only takes a minute or so.
Step 1 (20 second fix):
First, find an email from me (use this one!), point, click and drag it to the "Primary" tab.
When you release your mouse, a little note will appear asking you to confirm you want to receive all future email from [email protected] to your inbox– simply click "Yes" when the alert pops up.
Optional: Want to take it one step further and remove these extra new tabs altogether?
Go to the Settings box in the upper right hand corner of your inbox and select "Settings." Click on the "Inbox" tab and unselect all categories but "Primary". Be sure to save your changes.
That's all there is to it! Thanks for taking this step so we can stay connected.
I’m not sure if you’ve heard about the changes coming to Gmail … they have a new feature that automatically filters your email into "Primary", "Social" and "Promotions".
The problem with this is that Gmail may very likely classify ALL of my emails, including my newsletters to you, as Promotions and you may never receive messages from me in your primary inbox again unless you take the simple steps below. It only takes a minute or so.
Step 1 (20 second fix):
First, find an email from me (use this one!), point, click and drag it to the "Primary" tab.
When you release your mouse, a little note will appear asking you to confirm you want to receive all future email from [email protected] to your inbox– simply click "Yes" when the alert pops up.
Optional: Want to take it one step further and remove these extra new tabs altogether?
Go to the Settings box in the upper right hand corner of your inbox and select "Settings." Click on the "Inbox" tab and unselect all categories but "Primary". Be sure to save your changes.
That's all there is to it! Thanks for taking this step so we can stay connected.
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