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How to handle fear and anxiety

7/30/2013

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Happy day to you!

It seems with every client I work with, the struggle with fear and the anxiety it produces comes up.  We all slip into this at times; but what strategies do you use when this happens to you? As Dr. Phil asks, "How are they workin' for ya'?"

Do you retreat and find ways to escape the feelings?  Maybe you use food, or substances that shift your mood and focus, or maybe you get busy in some way.

These strategies might help to temporarily distract you from the thoughts that created the fear; but they don't really work in a lasting way, do they?

PictureOh, oh. What IS that?
You know what creates fear?  It's created when you focus on what's wrong or what might go wrong. 

I believe that at some time during our evolution this was a very important strategy for our survival. 
To stay safe, we literally had to look out for what might be lurking in the woods.

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And, there are still times when it might be appropriate to notice, be prudent, and take appropriate actions for our survival.  But, more often than not, our life is not really at stake, and our thinking is irrational and counterproductive. 


New Possibilities for YOU!

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If you'd like a better way, here's what I suggest you  remember.  The positive intention underlying fear is to know that you'll be okay.  That's what it's all about. 

When you feel fear, it's your emotional guidance system reminding you that you're telling a story that's putting you in that survival mode; and it's not necessarily true!  You need to question your thinking.  "Is this interpretation I'm making of my situation really true, or are there other possible ways of thinking about this? What might feel better? (How might someone else think about this?)"  You'll find there's pretty much always some light behind your clouded thinking.

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Before your mind can be resourceful enough to think differently and come up with a better feeling story that will reassure you that you'll be okay, you need to relax to shift your brain out of that inappropriate, old, habitual survival mode.  A few deep breaths is usually all you need; or you might find a way to really relax. 

As you take those deep breaths, you might add a soothing thought like, "Relax. I'm safe.  My actual life is not in danger; and these thoughts I'm having aren't necessarily true."  Then continue with what I just mentioned earlier.  You'll feel SO much better, AND rather than escaping and avoiding, you'll be able to really take care of your concerns and those associated feelings much more effectively. 


As always, there's no need to struggle with this on your own.  If this seems too hard and you'd like some help, contact me and we'll schedule a time to explore new possibilities for you.

"For anyone who is seeking a little more personalized conversation, I highly recommend calling Ann for her complimentary Happiness Upgrade Activation call. I have been coaching with her; and in the areas of my life where I had felt "stuck" in a seemingly endless cycle she has helped me to achieve monumental growth and ultimately unbridled joy." Sera V.

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Do you use food to deal with your feelings or as a way to feel good?  Do you struggle with weight and find that it takes more will power than you have or requires more deprivation than you like?

Then I can't encourage you enough to join me in my Fall Inner Way Weight Loss Program, starting in September!


In this Inner Way Weight Loss Group, you will:
  • resolve any internal “tug-of-war” conflicts that make your weight loss an unnecessary struggle
  • learn and use effective mental strategies to make your weight loss easier
  • create lasting, intrinsic motivation strategies that work
  • learn forgiveness and unconditional love and acceptance of yourself
  • learn how to effectively overcome your triggers and challenges with food that seem to sabotage you
  • change your beliefs that are contributing to being overweight to ones that support you in being naturally and easily healthy, happy, and slender
  • learn and adopt eating strategies of naturally slender people so you can become one, too
  • learn more effective strategies for preventing and dealing with the stress and emotions that can lead to unhealthy habits
AND, you'll have lots of support and even laughter and fun in the process!  Really!

Watch for my e-mails with the details soon.  Groups are limited in size for lots of personal attention; so if you want to assure your spot, feel free to contact me now.  I can't wait to get started again!

"I feel like, for the first time, I am not using willpower and guilt to lose weight; and I am losing weight without feeling deprived...a first for me! Another benefit of this program is that I have begun to change my thinking from "I can't do this" to "anything is possible." And, this new belief applies to more than weight loss.
Basically, I really love everything about this program...the concepts, the exercises that help us practice the tools and the group support. Thank you, Ann!"  Gina J.


Supporting you in greater ease and joy, with a warm heart,

Ann


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IF YOU USE G MAIL, PLEASE READ THIS:

I’m not sure if you’ve heard about the changes coming to Gmail … they have a new feature that automatically filters your email into "Primary", "Social" and "Promotions".

The problem with this is that Gmail may very likely classify ALL of my emails, including my newsletters to you, as Promotions and you may never receive messages from me in your primary inbox again unless you take the simple steps below. It only takes a minute or so.

Step 1 (20 second fix):
First, find an email from me (use this one!), point, click and drag it to the "Primary" tab.

When you release your mouse, a little note will appear asking you to confirm you want to receive all future email from annide@newpossibilitiescoaching.com to your inbox– simply click "Yes" when the alert pops up.

Optional: Want to take it one step further and remove these extra new tabs altogether?

Go to the Settings box in the upper right hand corner of your inbox and select "Settings." Click on the "Inbox" tab and unselect all categories but "Primary". Be sure to save your changes.

That's all there is to it! Thanks for taking this step so we can stay connected.

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What does your body need to heal?

7/11/2013

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A joy-filled good day to you!

Wow.  It's been a long time since my last blog!  Guess I've been having fun!  Mark and I spent some glorious time on Martha's Vineyard with our Hitchhiking with Larry David author friend Paul Dolman, and then spent more time with family and nature on the Cape after that.  "Happy, thank you, more please!"  Hope you're finding ways to have fun, as well.  There's always a way, no matter what.

Now it's time to get back to my other passion, supporting you towards experiencing greater harmony, happiness and success; and I intend to do so while maintaining my vacation frame of mind!

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Did you know that your body creates cancer cells every day?  Yes!  However, your body is equipped with natural repair mechanisms and heals them.  That's our inherent design.  Beautiful isn't it?

The key thing is, those natural repair mechanisms only work when your body is in the relaxation response.  That's what activates the healing response. 

So it's really, really important to reduce your number of stress responses, and to increase your relaxation responses.  How do you do that?

Lucky for you, this is what we teach in all of our New Possibilities private and group coaching programs!  Obviously I can't teach you all of them in detail in this one blog; so I'll mention just a few key ones to get you started.

New Possibilities for YOU!

Making sure you have empowering beliefs versus ones that limit you or make you feel bad is key to living with a relaxed joy and ease.  If you know you have self-defeating beliefs, don't just accept them.  Find a way to shift them.  This is just as important as using medical interventions.

You also want to manage how you interpret situations and the meaning you attach to them.  If what you're thinking doesn't feel good (hence triggers the stress response), then challenge your thinking.  Is it true, or just your personal interpretation?  What other interpretation is possible that would feel better?  How might someone else think about it?

EFT, the Emotional Freedom Technique, is a great way to manage your moods and emotional responses, and to trigger your body's relaxation response .  By tapping on energy meridian points on your body, even without any dialogue, you will feel more relaxed.  It's very easy, and I highly recommend learning and using it.  I'm sure you can find some free tutorials on YouTube. 

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Lastly, for today, I can't say enough about the value of finding the space of stillness and peace with meditating, even for just a few minutes a day.  If you still feel like you can't take the time or can't do it well enough, try doing something meditative - something quiet, mindful and relaxing - anything that helps you to escape from your busy mind and to feel good.

While you're there, if you have something going on that needs to heal, ask your inner guidance, "What does my body need to heal?"  Some thought might come to you like, "find a way to work feeling less pressure" or "love and accept myself", or "take more time for yourself".   You get the idea.  You have your very own inner "doctor", per se, your inner wisdom.  Listen, and honor it.  It's your own prescription towards healing and health.

That's all for now.  But, as you know, I am always here for you.  If you'd like to learn more and get more personal attention, guidance and support to live with more ease and joy, then e-mail me at annide@newpossibilitiescoaching.com to schedule a complimentary happiness upgrade activation call to begin creating new possibilities for YOU. There's no need to struggle. Let your happiness and well-being be a priority, and from that all other good things you desire will flow to you.


Supporting you in greater ease and joy, with a warm heart,

Ann

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    Hope you enjoy my "Happy Moments" blog; because a happy life is just a series of happy moments. Feeling Good Matters!

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    Ann Ide

    Master New Possibilities Coach

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New Possibilities Coaching / Framingham, Massachusetts, USA  / AnnIde@NewPossibilitiesCoaching.com
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